No, not another penis, another person to lip synch along with them! Why in the hell do they need another person? Publicity stunt, much?

P.S. I know there are other members of the group (obviously) but he's just so pretty I had to post a solo shot. Sigh.

Everybody and their mother is covering Rihanna's Umbrella. The song actually grew on me, I used to hate it but now it's ok. John West's version is the best I've heard so far, click Play below to listen. Mandy Moore still freaks me out, especially when they close up on her eyes. Her version isn't half bad, though.

F to the U to the G to the L to the Y

When did Juanes get ugly?

God I love her, especially the whitening strips bit.

I've never really liked Mandy Moore. A couple of my friends went to school with her at Bishop Moore in Orlando and she was an uber-cunt so I'm totally not buying the whole humility thing from her. Besides, she's boring.

Here she is with the douche of all douches Billy Crudup. You know, the one who left his pregnant girlfriend (Nancy from Weeds) for Claire Daines. Ugh.

I love me some Alexyss Tyler. She's this local chat show host from Atlanta and she's a crazy bitch, but she speaks the truth. Here's a clip from one of her more recent shows discussing monster penises and the gays.

P.S. The lady next to her is her mom. I KNOW!

P.P.S. My favorite Alexyss quote of all time is this:
"We're hooked on the Penis Power and this man won't even buy you some shrimp from Long John Silver and that plate's what, $2.99? But he can give you a mouth full of sperm and a rectum full of sperm. We have to see what our issue is, because a man like that does not respect a woman."

Last night on The Hills Spencer (the douche) proposed to Heidi (the stupid whore). Not only is the show fake but so is her engagement ring. Douche got that shit at Ice Accessories, which you saw on the show last night, for $770.00! Now, I know that's a nice chunk of change but not for an engagement ring. And on top of that those aren't even real diamonds, they're made in a lab so it's basically cubic zirconia y'all. Again, you know my happy ass would rock it hardcore but the whore and the douche are supposed to be "living the big life". HAAAHAAAAA!

If you don't know what a Bear is, then you're probably a heterosexual male. A Bear is a kind of hairy muscular man man in the gay community. Or just watch the video and you'll know exactly what a Bear is. Here's the first ManBand made up of Bears from Holland, Bearforce1. That shit will now be playing on loop in my head.

Literally. Bitch is fierce, don't hate. Trina was at the OZone Awards in Miami yesterday, saving the day, apparently.

This is a video of a lion who was raised by these two dudes and then released into the wild. A year later they came back and found the lion and the lion totally remembered them. How freaking cute is that? Sigh. I can't even get Llora to remember me when that bitch escapes from the apartment. Picture my ass running after a retarded black lab. Let that process.

This bitch never ceases to amaze me. On the plus side, she is wearing panties. Woohoo for that. Silver lining, bitches, silver lining.

How cute is that puppy!

Wasn't she in jail. Shouldn't she be still in jail? My cousin used to love this crazy bitch. Me, not so much. There's Brit-tit crazy (which I love) and then there's Gloria crazy (which I'm scared of).

Amy Winehouse, my favorite little crackhead, has finally entered rehab. This after a megahit song where she sings about not going to rehab. Good for her, she's got an amazing voice and wait a minute fuck that shit. Crack was the best thing to happen to Whitney Houston. We would've never heard about Bobby and her dookie bubble if it weren't for the cocaina.

Here's Amy with JayZ with Rehab:

Monday nights used to be boring but ever since Heroes came along they've been pretty good. Last night was the premiere of Weeds, and I have to say that show is fucking amazing. It keeps getting better and better with every season. So does Big Love, surprisingly. The season finale is in two weeks but they've moved to Sunday nights, probably to replace the horrible John From Cincinnati. I tried watching it for a bit but got sooooooo tired of it all. And rounding out the list is The Hills, which isn't necessarily good television but it is entertaining. I know it's fake, I know they're "acting" but I can't get enough of those stupid hos. Sigh.

If you haven't gotten Mika's debut album Life in Cartoon Motion, you're really missing out. I've got a new favorite track on there, Over My Shoulder. LOVE IT!