Child services is investigating Brit-tit Spears after being tipped off from multiple sources that Brit-tit gives her kids the drink drink to make them sleepy and not so hyper. She also doesn't brush their teeth or put them to bed, letting them fall asleep whenever and wherever. Damn. Even Llora has a bed time.

Listen, alls I'm saying is that a couple of members of my family thinks it's ok to dip your finger in rum and let a baby suck on it when you have to fly, that way it sleeps for the entire ride. What? We all grew up to be fine, respectable members of society. I take that back.