Tommy Cruise is going to be on Oprah today! Set your TIVO's, bitches!

*Bitch aint ever leaving. No offense to her fans, but who was she before Tom Cruise? Just the wonky-eyed chick from Dawson's Creek.

Katie Holmes got rid of the Rihanna bob and is now rocking Rihanna's new cut. Sort of. What do you guys think, is it an upgrade or a downgrade?

I personally think that Tom is obsessed with Rihanna, you know, cause all the gays love her, and he wants her to dress up like Ri-Ri. Kind of like how my ex boyfriend used to make me dress like Cher. Long story, don't ask.

VIA ONTD

Does Katie Holmes actually look gorgeous and effortless? Damn, maybe all that hanging around with Posh Beckham has done the girl some good. And I love the coat and want it oh so badly. And the shoes.

Katie Holmes arrived at the Late Show to promote her new movie Mad Money. I'm not going to see the movie (it looks shiteous) but I have to give her props on the outfit. But with the glasses she kind of reminds me of a brunette Anna Wintour:

It's long but worth it.

P.S. - I know I never really dug Tom Cruise, and I know he's batshit crazy in this video, but he's looking damn hot. Just sayin'.

What the hell happened to Tom Cruise's face? I mean, even though I'm not attracted to him and never have been, I have to admit he wasn't extremely tragic looking. Now he just looks bloated. Coke bloat does that to the face. Not that I'm saying he's on the blow, but his face sure as hell doesn't know he's not.

Anyways, I also have to admit that Katie Holmes looks pretty good here. The couple attended the L.A. premiere of her new movie (which looks like it's going to suck hard) Mad Money last night. I love her dress and the shoes are pretty awesome.

Since when did wearing drapery become high fashion? This chick kills me. Her style is anything but effortless and it shows. And I don't get it. I mean, it's not hideous (my mom disagrees), but it's not great. It just looks like a drape/sheet. And no I'm not going to blame the designer, she's the one who picked it out. Oh wait, that's right, Tom Cruise picks out all her close. Bitch needs to realign himself with his gay side, because that outfit does not fly.

Here's more of Katie Holmes presenting at the Critics Choice Awards on Monday.

What is Katie Holmes wearing? And she honestly thinks she's a style icon? Ugh. Tom and Katie were caught leaving the L'Ermitage Hotel in Beverly Hills yesterday after a night of sweet, sweet passionate lovemaking. Ew, I just threw up in my mouth. You know he makes her strap it on right. OMG let me not get into a story about my ex-boyfriend. I think I just threw up in my mouth again.

Katie Holmes joins ANTM's Saleisha in failing at trying to get the Rihanna cut. Rihanna did it like last year and nobody will top it so bitches better stop trying.

P.S. - While we're on the subject, Katie dear, why are you trying so hard? You're not Posh. You're look isn't effortless and that's what a fashion icon's style is.

P.P.S. - This picture really creaps me out. She's doing something with her eyes and I'm 100% sure it's not smiling...

I'm going with the majority who think that TomKat are creepy. I mean, look at them. It's like stepford times 100.

Tom and Katie attended the Bambi Awards in Germany yesterday, where Tom received an award for courage due to his role in his upcoming movie, Valkyrie. Wait, I thought the Germans were pissed about that movie?

There will always be something off with TomKat for me. I don't know what it is, but they seriously do not seem real. It's like they try way too hard to prove their real and fashionable and whatnot, but fail. Or maybe it's Katie's velvet dress that fails. Me no likey.

Katie and Tom attended the Moving Image Salute Ceremony to honor Tom at Cipriani this past Tuesday night. Her hair is cute, though. Props for that.

I'm still amazed by the all around cuteness that is Suri Cruise. She's freaking adorable and looks just like my cousin when she was that age, who just about to turn 6. My how they grow so quickly.

Suri and mommy Kate were seen walking around Washington DC yesterday.

I wonder... could that be a real fur coat Suri's sporting?

Tom Cruise went on TRL to promote Lions for Lambs. I'm all for teaching children and whatnot but I honestly don't think a movie about Afghanistan is going to go over well with the TRL crowd.

But I digress, what shade of blush do you think Tommy's sporting there. Don't get me wrong, he doesn't look a day over Top Gun, but still. Maybe it's because I prefer masculinity in men. Snap.